running

A well-known runner was found recently in the desert on one of his normal ordinary runs...sad. I was in two minds whether to post my thoughts, but wanted to atleast make a mention. M is a runner, and it just reminded me of my father, also a long distance runner, though in his free time. He was always running, jogging, walking on his free time, even if it meant (well especially if it meant, leaving behind his car for the day!). Summers for fun, we´d jog-run for about 20 miles on the weekends, and about 10 out into the countryside on weekdays. During our runs, we´d banter back and forth during the jog time discussing usually math and science. He´d grill me on maths, and I answered his pop quizes:). Dad was a chemist, great in the sciences and maths, so good he often would call up publishers to tell them the correct answers to their wrongly published ¨answers¨,). He hand-built a huge telescope, including hand grinding the glass lens, for a well-known university, and at the time I now wish I´d asked him more about it! But when you´re young, you think your parents will always be there to answer your questions so you have time to ask another time. I wish I had more time running with him, but he died when I was young. I stopped running after that, and haven´t run much since, as it was too painful because it reminded me too much of him. Running was one of our big things to do together, like our talks, and our outdoorsy things. It´s been difficult all this time since to think of my father, so often I just pretended to forget him, as remembering, or seeing anything he´d touched or a photo of him, even now, makes me cry. I wish I´d have let myself remember more, and more often now!

The other day when M was found, it was a sad day. And it has reminded me ever since of my father and our runs. My dad ran like M, out in the open, on rugged ground, in shoes he fixed himself, and in spite of his career, was always a free spirit.

I can remember the deserts, or thereabouts, where M runs, as I used to live there. Beautiful deadly. A bit like Norway, but much more spread out. No cell phone coverage in those areas, so no reason to bring one for emergencies, for if you get in an emergency out there, you will have nothing but yourself to get you out. Sad about M, but I know that if my dad had had his way, he would have chosen to die the way M died, running outdoors in such a wonderful, wild, rugged place. Outdoors, on one of his usual daily runs.

Maybe I´ll start running again...something else I can share with our kids, that my father shared with me:)